Tales From The Janitor’s Closet
I have worked for the same janitorial company for more than 30 years and for the last 13 years or so I have been their office manager. On the rare occasion when we get a new customer, my boss likes to have me go to the building with him to meet the customer and become familiar with the site. After all, once he’s signed the customer up he’s done and I become the face of the company.
We just signed up a new customer and this past Monday I met the boss at our new customer’s facility. Of the group, I was the only one wearing a mask.
“What is wrong with you people?! How long do we have to be in a pandemic before you start taking it seriously?! People are still getting Covid and still dying from it! My brother-in-law had a bad enough case he was in the hospital! (He’s out now and recovering at home, thank you very much.) I’m looking around at your employees and I’m only seeing two wearing masks! And what’s with shaking hands?! Are you trying to get everyone sick?!”
That was what I said inside my head as I acted pleasantly professional and shook their hands. I kept a bit of a distance and kept my mask on. I sanitized my hands once we left. I sanitized them twice.
I Got To Torture…Er…Test My Son
My wife Amy and I have a 17 year old son named Hayden. This is his senior year and he has spent most of it in his room. A few weeks ago, he came to us to tell us he and a group of friends were going to do a Spring Break thing. He demanded we agree to it.
We agreed. They weren’t going to Cancun or Daytona. Their plan was to head way up north in Minnesota to hang out at one of those Airbnb houses. And they are up there now.
Oh, boy! Amy and I are quite nervous about this, but he has been cooped up and is a pretty responsible kid, so we are muddling through. This is the first time he has spent more than a night or two away from us.
The group he’s with seem pretty responsible, too. One of them insisted they all get tested for Covid a few days before getting together. Hayden tells us everyone tested negative.
And the testing was the fun part!
For me, I mean. I got to ram that swab up his nose to get some ick on it to be tested. I hadn’t anticipated that I would be doing the procedure. I also hadn’t anticipated how much fun it would be. Hee! Hee! Hee!
I’M SCHEDULED!!
On last week’s show I lamented about my envy of my wife and a friend who had both gotten scheduled to receive the Covid vaccine while I hadn’t. All this past week I checked and checked and checked my email looking for my invite from my insurance company.
Nothing. Day after day. Nothing.
My Facebook was filling up with people getting their appointment or their first dose or their second! Me? Nothing.
Then came late Friday afternoon. My invite was in the email! I called my wife to let her know and to have her on the phone in case I needed assistance in filling out the online form.
I answered the questions and clicked the buttons and there it was – the page with the next available date (April 16) and a list of times to choose from. I clicked my choice and this came up…
“Gah! Of course! This is what happens to me!”
Amy told me to calm down and try again.
A second attempt and success!
And I just noticed that the page does indicate I will be getting the Pfizer vaccine.
Woo hoo!
When you get your chance to, get vaccinated!
My New Watch, You Should SEE My New Watch
Back in February, I talked about how one of my favorite things given to me by my brother-in-law (a Swiss Army Design wristwatch by Wenger) had stopped running. I had dropped it on the floor and some debris inside the watch got stuck in the gears. A watch repair person was able to get it running again, but to fix it properly would cost more than the watch was worth.
I decided to get a new watch. It’s a Timex and it has the day of the week and date display. I don’t recall ever having a watch with both and I couldn’t figure out how to set the date. There was no manual included, so I went to the YouTube. I found a video, but I think the YouTuber didn’t know what he was doing.
So, I called the clock/watch store that helped me find a repair place for that other watch. They talked me right through it over the phone. Easy as cake. That YouTuber didn’t know what he was doing. He did stumble on turning the date, but it appears he didn’t realize what he had done.
As I attempted to figure out how to set it all up, I noticed a feature I didn’t know the watch had: The face lights up!
Forget that other watch! I have a new favorite!
Dave Letterman Does Impressions And Sparky Anderson Praises 1987 Minnesota Twins
With the pandemic starting its second year of existence, my impatience in getting a vaccination appointment, my anxiety about Hayden doing a Spring Break, missing my friends, and probably several other problems I was feeling awfully down this past week. Going back to my high school years, I would sometimes get in a funk that might last a few days. It’s hard to explain, but I’m certain it isn’t uncommon for most people to get in the occasional funk.
I turned to my old pal Dave Letterman. On the YouTube there are several clips of Dave’s Late Night show. Lots of Viewer Mail segments (here’s the very first one) and there’s even a superclip of Dave doing impressions. Dave is not known for doing impressions, but maybe he should be.
The clips helped lighten my mood.
Especially the video that showed Dave doing impressions of Sparky Anderson, the legendary manager of baseball’s Cincinnati Reds (1970-1978) and Detroit Tigers (1979-1995). Dave’s impressions of Sparky were done in 1987, which is a magical year for Minnesota Twins fans.
It was the year the Twins beat the powerhouse Tigers in the ALCS and then beat the St. Louis Cardinals in the World Series. The Twins were the underdogs in both series, so the victories (both the first in franchise history, well as the Twins, the franchise did win a World Series in 1924 when they were the Washington Senators) were especially sweet.
And Sparky’s praise of the Twins, their manager Tom Kelly, and the Minnesota fans was a very cool thing!
Baseball Is Back
Sure, the Twins blew a three run lead in the bottom of the ninth and lost to the Milwaukee Brewers in extra innings on Opening Day. And big-time Twins third baseman Josh Donaldson, who came to the team last year with a four year $92 million contract, who only managed to play 28 games in last year’s 60 game pandemic-shortened season due to injuries, managed to injure himself running out a double in the first inning, has returned to the injured list.
But, baseball is back!
Ahhhhhh!
Be patient. Wash your hands. Stay home. Stay safe. WEAR A MASK! Get vaccinated!
Dimland Radio opening theme song: Ram by The Yoleus
First ad break bumpers: All Gone Away by The Style Council and She’s Calling You by Bad Brains
Second ad break bumpers: Telephone Operator by Pete Shelley and Empty Glass by Pete Townshend
Closing song: Angler’s Treble Hook by $5 Fiddle
That’s it! See you next Saturday night for Dimland Radio 11 Central, midnight Eastern on www.ztalkradio.com you can also download my show from the z talk show archives page. You can email your questions and comments to drdim@dimland.com
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